The Overwhelmed Mom: 5 Steps You Can Take To Improve Your Quality of Life
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We all want what’s best for our children, and frankly it is what keeps us moving forward everyday… That, and possibly a cup of coffee (or two). But have you ever pushed yourself so hard to the point where you are doing the best you can, but no matter how hard you try it still doesn’t feel enough?
That’s called burnout.
I think moms are experts at the art of juggling and masters of the seemingly never-ending laundry list of responsibilities. Whether it’s making sure your son doesn’t leave his baseball helmet at practice AGAIN, carving out time for that Italian restaurant you and your husband have been talking about, or securing that promotion at work– getting overwhelmed is not a matter of “if,” but a matter of “when.”
If the past couple paragraphs hit a bit too close to home, I want you to know that you aren’t alone. Here are five steps that I personally implement whenever I need that little pick-me-up to get me back on my feet.
Identify the issue.
I recently found myself in a season where I was utterly overwhelmed, and full of anxiety. I was waking up everyday with what is described as the “pit in the stomach”. I literally thought there was a pit in my stomach and it went on for quite a while. So, I took some time to really process and talk things through with my husband and tried to figure out what was causing the problem. I realized that I was being WAY too unreasonable with myself in terms of how much I *thought* I could pile on my plate.
Seek out community.
Always remember that you are not alone. Just to hear somebody else say, “yeah me too” is SO good for you. I encourage you to pick up the phone and call somebody, go for a walk, or join a community of people going through the same thing as you.
That is exactly what my newsletter “You’re In Good Company” is for– I talk about parenting tips & advice, emotional support as a parent, and resources for balancing your life as a busy parent. Click here to be a part of a tight knit community approaching 1,000 in numbers!
Declutter your space = declutter your mind.
Our environment affects the way we work, think, and respond more than you might realize. I discovered that when the counters are scrubbed, or when that crazy stack of mail on my desk is cleared away, and I’m not constantly tripping over a toy, I gain so much mental clarity. The best part is decluttering doesn’t even have to take up a huge chunk of your time. Just spend 10 minutes cleaning every couple days, and feel the difference it makes on your mental energy!
Do the unconventional thing.
If you work from home, take a 15-20 minute power nap (a non-addictive alternative to that 2nd cup of coffee 😉). And if you are working in the office, take a mental health day every couple months. If you’re buried in work, try taking a few hours off work. You’ll be surprised what a little rest can do to your productivity.
I know that for some of us, skipping out on our kid’s soccer practice or orchestra recital brings a lot of guilt. The thing is we are there for our children 99.9% of the time, so just skip that 0.1% and see how you feel! Sometimes, you CAN say no without having to give a “good enough” reason.
Reach out for help.
There are so many ways you can ask for help by reaching out to your loved ones. It could be asking a grandparent or your sister to keep an eye on the kids for the evening, or hiring a house cleaner, or getting your groceries delivered.
Teaching your children how to help you is another great option! Middle schoolers have the capability to clean the toilet, wash dishes, load the dishwasher, etc. So give them some responsibilities around the house, especially when life starts getting a bit overwhelming. They may not get it right the first time around, but you’ll see quick improvements with proper guidance and instructions!
Many overwhelmed moms (myself included) often fall into the trap of needing to do everything all on our own, rather than accepting help from others. But remember– our family and friends want the best for us, and I bet they’d be more than willing to give us a lending hand.
Life is full of ups and downs, lefts and rights. One moment, it can feel like the world is crumbling down, and the next, you feel like you’re the happiest mom on Earth. I hope these 5 steps can help you ride through the waves and create a much more meaningful and fulfilling life for you and your family.
Want to read more? Check out this article “Middle School Mom Health Is Plummeting - 4 Ways To Help” to learn about how you can take the right steps towards improving your physical and mental health as a mom of tweens and teens.